Managing Daycare Unease and Guilt

Putting a child in daycare can be extremely challenging for parents. It is normal for them to be concerned about the suitability of the center, their own feelings of guilt about “abandoning” the toddler and the effect of separation on the child.

Daycare is a necessity for many families: parents have to work, or have other commitments that prevent them from being with the child during the day.

Reasoning about the necessity of daycare and its obvious benefits apart, the guilt you feel may remain strong. This can affect your function and success at work. Here are a few strategies to help you cope with these normal feelings of guilt.

Find the right daycare

Find a nearby daycare that you can trust. This is easier said than done. Daycare centers are mushrooming everywhere, and all of them make tall claims of how good they are. Finding and contacting them all, checking which ones may be right for you, and visiting them would demand a huge amount of time and effort.

A good solution to this hassle is to make use of a reliable internet portal dedicated to childcare issues. That will provide you with details of all the licensed daycare centers in your area. Thus, you can start a dialog with them to find the one that is right for you and your child.

Let not your kid sense your unease

You may feel terribly insecure when your child first starts going to daycare. You may not be able to control this feeling of unease, but do not let your child see how bad you feel. Children are very perceptive and what you feel will affect them, even if they do not understand the experience you are undergoing.

Highlight the fun aspects of daycare life

A couple of weeks before starting daycare, create at home a positive buzz about it. Focus on the fun aspects like making new friends, playing new games and so on. Highlight the fact that daycare is part of growing up and that the child is becoming a “big boy/girl.”

Let the kid get used to daycare as something normal

Do not make a huge fuss when the child returns home. Take an interest in what happened during the day but do not make it feel as if the child has done something very special by leaving home for the day. It should be taken as part of the normal progression like moving from soft infant toys to those, which are suitable for a toddler.

Think of the benefits, not the separation

Do not be upset over the separation from your child. Consider instead how positive the life of daycare is, and how good it is for the child.

Reorganize your schedule

Rearrange your schedule as much as you can to spend more time with your child in the evenings and on weekends. Plan holiday special occasions and take your child to zoos, amusement parks and other places children love.

Once daycare becomes a pleasant everyday routine for you and your child, the unease and guilt will subside. The key factor in this testing experience is to find the right daycare, where you know for sure your child is safe, happy and well cared for.